Maybe, though unfortunately, a lot of you can relate to this…About 7 years ago my parents got divorced. But it wasn’t an easy divorce (if there is such a thing) nor a short one. The divorce process lasted about 5 years, and it killed just about everything in me. Morning, afternoon, and evening meals were served with tears, and each day was so exhausting that I had no energy to write. Quite honestly, I had no desire to write. My perfect life that I thought I had was gone, and at the time, I didn’t remember, nor really care how cathartic writing could be.
Before the divorce, I was working on a children’s novel entitled Dolphin Dude on Duty, which I had written in fifth grade. The original story takes place underwater in an unnamed town. Dolphin Dude is a dolphin who is also a policeman. In the short fifth grade version, Dolphin Dude comes face to face with his arch nemesis, Sammy Shark, and after a somewhat anticlimactic scene, Dolphin Dude arrests Sammy Shark with the help of Gus Goldfish and Wally Whale. Because the story was so basic, I was developing a more complex storyline, one that would show maturity, and one that could be complicated enough to endure an entire child’s chapter book. However, after the divorce was final, I had a very difficult time coming back to the story because it reminded me of the period of time during the divorce process. Even trying to edit the story brought back bad memories.
I actually hadn’t opened up the manuscript until 11 months ago. In July of last year, I met my fiancé in my dad’s office at work—strange place, I know. The more we started talking, the more we realized that our backgrounds weren’t much different. Both of our parents had divorced with many of the same circumstances. It was only through listening to my fiancé speak about his struggles with overcoming the sadness and bitterness that I learned how to release my own past not only to write Dolphin Dude again, but also to fully write like myself again. He taught me that no matter what, divorce doesn’t really stop hurting, but it is what we do with those emotions that makes the difference. I had to make the decision that I would use my emotions to fuel my writing instead of letting the fears and distrust haunt me, consume me, and destroy my love of words.
It is very difficult to write in turmoil. Now that you have made the decision to get back to your story, I wish you all the best.
ReplyDeleteI was wondering if you experience with your parents divorce would be reflected in the children's chapter book.
ReplyDelete